When I was young, I considered sex very sacred and pure, but I thought that one should only have a relationship with someone who loves and loves him, and I considered any relationship outside of it ugly and unreasonable, and even thinking I considered it an unforgivable sin
And until I got married, I had no sexual experience at all, and I was proud that I had not been with anyone but my wife.
We also had a good life, but unfortunately, after a few years, due to some family problems, such as the death of my father and the financial problems of my father's family, and our relationship, we were also affected. Less than that, the ideal and lovable life turned into a hell for both of us in a way that it was impossible to continue and we separated.
After a while, the family chocolate finally dissolved and I was left with a confused mind. My thoughts were confused, not that I was crazy :)) but little by little I was coming to the conclusion that many of the criteria and criteria I had set for myself in life were not very realistic.
I no longer considered love so sacred, I no longer considered sex to be more of an instinct that can be viewed as eating and sleeping, and there is no need to think of love and affection to fulfill it, and even worse, no need to Not knowing the other side
After a while, I was gradually drawn to prostitutes, those who are willing to pay for your money, no need to be cute, no love, no need to think about who she is and what she thinks.
For a while it was not bad, my sexual needs were met, but little by little this method was not very satisfactory for me. I realized that in addition to being satisfied, it seems that something else is needed in sex.
This lack of connection with the sexual partner, although it had advantages, but it also seemed to have disadvantages. I tried to limit my sexual partners, that is, to be in a relationship with one or two specific people, but I soon realized that the thought is very meaningless because the other party considers this relationship a profession, and this method, in addition to increasing costs and engaging with Their nonsense and irrelevant life has nothing.
Little by little, I became disillusioned with that method and it got to a point where I could not stand that kind of relationship at all.
I thought of having a girlfriend, after a while I met a reasonable and suitable girl, but I realized very soon and she just started this relationship for marriage, which did not fit well with my way of thinking, and the relationship was cut off.
After one or two more attempts, I found a divorced woman who thought more or less like me, and after a relatively short period of friendship, the relationship went to bed. The first time we had sex, I felt that I was not interested in continuing the relationship. But on the other hand, I thought I was taking it too hard and decided to keep the relationship and continue it, but unfortunately after a few months, I realized that my partner's mindset has changed and he is becoming very dependent and I am in the form of a wife. Sees
All I could think about was that I could not accept such a woman, whom I had chosen in this way, as my wife, even though she was both educated and understanding and beautiful and graceful, but the way we met was not an interesting beginning.
I thought it would be better to end the relationship, which, of course, was not easy at all and had many problems and headaches
For a while after this process, I became completely carefree about sex and became complacent. This period lasted for maybe more than a year. They are not what they should be and I thought about getting married again. I got married again after almost three years from the previous divorce, and I have been living with my wife for more than 1 years now.
Now, at almost 45 years old, I do not consider sex a sacred thing and limited to marriage and the person you love, but I do not find a casual relationship with anyone at all interesting, and it is a fleeting desire. I know how many times it will be interesting to try it
